We had a great time at the night munch on Saturday. We got talking to a fellow kinkster about how she enjoys stapling herself. Slade and I, still new to this world, were honestly a little shocked, but also totally fascinated!
The next day we were cuddling in bed. Out of curiosity, I asked him, “do you think you could put a staple in someone?”
Let me be clear, this was not a suggestion. It was simply an opportunity to learn more about my partner’s limits and desires.
His knee jerk answer was going to be “no,” but then he started thinking about it.
“Maybe???” He said after a moment, a little surprised in himself.
We tried to leave the conversation at that, but I had clearly awoken something in both our brains that did not want to let this go.
Eventually Slade left the bedroom and came back with a stapler and a banana… “just to see” how it might feel to put a staple in something.
The staple went into the banana easily. So logistically this works.
Now what?
He made some “I’m-totally-joking” threats about putting a staple in me. I wriggled around the bed nervously giggling. Then the threats got a little more real, and I enjoyed the feeling. I could feel my heart starting to quicken.
I laid my head against his chest. Slade started slowly pulling down my undies, exposing my bare bottom. I was still wriggling, starting to get a little afraid. He took the stapler and held it against a bare cheek.
This felt terrifying.
Heart racing, breathing rapidly, I tried to cuddle him and play my favourite “no don’t hurt me, just cuddle me instead” game.
He didn’t stop.
The threat of that open stapler with its teeth grinning against my skin was flooding me anxiety. lt was activating the part of my brain that is quite seriously phobic of medial procedures – only instead of feeling the panic was out of control, I knew I was ultimately in control. All I had to do was say “yellow” and Slade would stop….
… but I didn’t say yellow.
I was enjoying being in this space too much to stop. Playing with my fear in a way that feels fun, exhilarating and super hot. Also, my thing for villains was finding Slade’s sadistic side to be a massive turn on. I felt completely at his mercy, wanting to submit to him, to be vulnerable. He later told me how much fun it was to feel so in control of me, but also feel the intense trust we have in each other.
I didn’t know if he would actually do it… but he did.
CHONK! He pushed the stapler into me.
I was expecting pain but I felt nothing… I didn’t think it had worked. I stopped moving, then he whispered to me “do you want to feel it?” And I cautiously felt with my fingers…an actual staple in my butt cheek!
On the surface, the idea of having your partner put a staple in your butt seems pretty strange – but in reality, this experience was super fun and intimate.
To me, this is kink. It is intoxicating exploration, bonding with a partner, while learning a hell of a lot about yourself along the way!
FYI, I’ve always believed I am a total sook when it comes to pain. Turns out… I’m braver than I thought. * casual shrug *
For me, the most surprising thing is that I feel BDSM is helping me manage my anxiety. I get to explore it and understand it in a safe place, where I don’t have to be afraid of it. No matter what happens good or bad, I know Slade will be right there to catch me. In an instant, that super hot scary bad guy snaps back into the person I feel safest with in the world.
He is incredible.
We are incredible.
Kink is a world that most people will never experience or understand. I feel so lucky that I get to share this journey with him.
(Originally posted to Fetlife)
